She sits on the sofa, rocking her baby, a tear rolls down her face. Postpartum wasn't supposed to be like this. She thought it would be different. She isn't the woman who let's her house get out of control. She isn't the woman that hasn't showered in... how many days? But, tomorrow is going to be different. Through her tears...
One more night of take out, and tears, and tired. Today she called Chinook City Doulas. Tomorrow her postpartum doula is coming.
It was a long night.
Or a short night. It depends on how you look at it.
She dresses. Rather, she changes into more presentable pajamas. The phone rings! Her postpartum doula wants to know if she needs anything from the shops. Milk, diapers... She peers into the almost empty fridge. Everything? No problem. Her postpartum doula will help her with a meal plan and the shopping.
Soon after her postpartum doula arrives. Baby is adored and she heads to the bath for a much needed soak. She luxuriates in the silence. Just water swishing. She conditions her hair and soaks away the tension. When she's finished in the tub, she takes her time, dressing, styling her hair, a little mascara. She feels human again.
In the kitchen, her postpartum doula has loaded the dishwasher, wiped all the counters and banished the piles of pizza boxes. There's a pot of tea steeping on the counter and a plate of toast. It's for her. The baby who never sleeps is magically content in his swing, so she curls up in her favorite chair and just watches him be.
Her postpartum doula sits down beside her and together they plan the weeks meals based on family preferences. Her doula will whip up a few things for today from what's left in the house and tomorrow she will pick up the groceries on her way.
Baby is hungry and she's more than ready to be close to him again. With her postpartum doula's assistance, she tries a new breastfeeding position. While she feeds her baby, her postpartum doula gathers the laundry, sorts it and starts the wash. She can do this. She knows it now.
That evening she puts her baby into her carrier the way her postpartum doula showed her. Her husband comes in and is blown away by the difference in her. Somehow she became even more beautiful the day she became the mother of his child. She serves the stew from the slow cooker and together they settle in for a little "Netflix and chill".
She looks at her little family. She looks around at the house she has made a home. This is her life. Her beautiful life. This moment is perfect. It's everything she dreamed it would be.